Geek Chic Saturnalia Sale
The Roadshow Video walkthrough! Gift Coins!

Saturnalia 2015

Saturnalia 2015

Welcome to Saturnalia 2015!

Deposit between now and December 31st and Geek Chic will send you a little something for your Holiday enjoyment. What better way to tell your family that there's more to come?

See your choices by reading this newsletter.



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2016 Dates and Locations


Geek Chic Roadshow 2016 convention schedule is posted!

We're very excited for this year's lineup.

Bear in mind, we're still waiting to hear confirmation on some of these-- expect to see "To Be Determined" on several shows, particularly near the end of the year. We've added a little TBD cheat sheet on the left for you.

See where we'll be...


For Game Room and Dining Room


For Comic Books, Collectibles, and Display


Living Room, Kitchen, and Coffee tables


The Butt Stops Here


Bespoke and Customizations

What is Bespoke?

Think of it in terms of tailoring. None of our furniture is off the rack-- it's all what would be described as "made to measure". It starts with a pattern, and with a series of thorough measurements and expert guidance, you get the perfect fit.

Bespoke is one step further. Bespoke is for the client looking to have something made for them and them alone-- it's the highest degree of customization available. With a special valet and the dedicated time of our research and development team, we work with you to create individualized furniture that will last you a lifetime.

Who is a client?

You may not know quite what you're looking for. But you know we're the people to do it.

Who isn't?

To be clear: Simply having money is not enough to work with Geek Chic. (Though it certainly doesn't hurt.) You're asking us to make you something-- it's a personal process.

If you're not willing to go on a journey with us, you shouldn't attempt a bespoke project. You need to give up a little control to get the best from us-- we are engineers, designers, and craftsmen with decades of experience, and we're here to solve your problem. Sometimes, we're even here to solve your solution.

How much does it cost?

Bespoke projects can be between several hundred dollars to several hundred thousand dollars. It is all relative to the scope of the project. A simple way of estimating is to try to compare your project with a piece from our catalog. It can not cost less than that.

Gift Certificates

Because cards are boring and money is awesome.

Gaming Accessories

In support of the games you love.

Mustache Monocles

Dignity... for your face.

Card Storage

Step one: put your deck in a box.


Gift Certificates & Memberships

Mustache Monocles

Gaming Accessories

Card Storage

Ladies and Gentlemen!

Geek Chic travels to conventions year 'round, all over the country. What better way to see our furniture before you buy it? Get your hands on the tables, see how they work-- and if you like, bring your partner or game group by to see the quality of our woodworking. Nothing beats seeing it in person.

Likewise, our Roadshow crew is the real deal. We don't work on commission, and we love what we do-- so come on over and sit a spell. We'd love to share with you.

See you there!


Road Show 2016

PAX South
January 29-31
San Antonio, TX
GAMA (Trade Show)
March 14-18
Las Vegas, NV
Emerald City Comicon
April 7-10
Seattle, WA
PAX East
April 22-24
Boston, MA
San Diego Comic-Con
July 20-24
San Diego, CA
Gen Con
August 4-7
Indianapolis, IN
PAX West
September 2-5
Seattle, WA
September 2-5
Atlanta, GA

The Quick Rundown

Geek Chic has been designing and manufacturing geek furniture exclusively since 2008. Starting as only three fellas in a garage, it has grown to 35 employees in 28,000 square feet.

Expanding our offerings to fully bespoke furniture and a range of design and consultant services is only the beginning as we continue our mission to design, shape, and elevate the geek lifestyle.


About the Owner

Robert Gifford, CEO of Geek Chic

Robert Gifford is a one-man-show of business, design, woodworking, gaming, and all things geek.

Robert is the founder and CEO of Geek Chic, makers of heirloom quality gaming tables, comic book storage, seating, and geek accessories.

Our People

Many people make the gears of Geek Chic go. (About 40, to quanitify.) Our woodworkers are an extraordinary force of hard work, expertise, and talent. They're why we can have nice things. And you may have met our valets at conventions-- top-notch guides to the Geek Chic lifestyle, who work with you to find that custom fit. They're why you can have nice things.

There's also a guy who does our epic wooden weapon art for shows. Several CAD folk who engineer and remodel and measure everything twice-- twice. A Bespoke valet. Engineers, designers, artists, woodworkers. An accountant who is very patient with us, and lawyers who are paid to be impatient with everyone. We have drivers, data geeks, writers, quality control guys, a Ron (which means "spray finish kung-fu master"), a laser customization guy, print nerds, and even our very own CEO. And from top to bottom, we believe in what we're making here.

Geek Chic is exactly the kind of culture we want it to be.

The Shop

Sawdust, sawdust everywhere.

We have a full woodshop. You'll find everything here from hand tools like chisels, planers, sanders, and saws, to larger shop tools like band saws, table saws, and-- look, a lot of it is saws. The rest of it is clamps and drills. This is not a CNC, mass-manufacture, cookie-cutter type of place, it's a place where craftsmen make furniture by hand.

We're delighted to say we've been expanding over the years, and our once-small Seattle shop has grown to fill several buildings. We're now a three-shop operation. Engineering, production, and finishing each get their own breathing space-- a long way from where we started.

The Wood

Our tables are built with only the very best hardwoods. We use North American Cherry, Hard Rock Sugar Maple, Quartersawn White Oak, and top quality Black Walnut. These are sustainably forested within the United States.


Fact & Theory

The respository where you'll find definitions, philosophy, and the long answers to questions you didn't even ask yet.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it also gave us one that is both alive and dead until we open the box.



'Heirloom quality' has become a marketing phrase of indefinite meaning. As always, we try to define our terms at Geek Chic, so marketing jibba-jabba doesn't make you feel as if you're in a game of Three-card Monte. Heirloom Quality simply means we have constructed the piece with the materials and joinery techniques that will outlast you.

As an example, The Sultan gaming table is constructed with extensive dovetail joinery. Dovetails allow pieces that come together at 90° to be fit together like puzzle pieces. In fact, the Sultan is completely 'dry-fitted' before final glue-up. Without a drop of glue, the Sultan holds itself together. This kind of construction is not quick, but it does endure.

We also use solid hardwoods on our tables. Most furniture today is made with veneers over plywood, particleboard, or even less desirable composite materials; damage that your furniture inevitably sustains can break through the veneer, revealing the less attractive core. While all furniture, if used, will sustain wear and damage over its lifetime, solid hardwoods often aquire a "character" in this process, as natural dings and dents don't draw attention to themselves in a negative way. If, however, one day, you decide that your furniture looks shabby, refinishing your furniture will result in a piece that is literally good as new.

There is one more benefit to Heirloom Quality furniture that we believe warrants mentioning: Heirloom Quality is an essential step towards environmentally sound living. If you want to buy something that has low environmental impact, buy something you don't intend to throw away.


What we call extra-custom pieces of furniture. It doesn't really apply to custom-engraved tower flags, for instance, so much as it applies to gaming furniture that you have highly modified to make your own. It's a degree of tailoring.


Our Latin motto, of sorts. It means, "Come out of the basement!"


Why you want to wait

Waiting is without question the worst part of ordering a piece of furniture from Geek Chic. While some of the sometimes torturous length is due to the overwhelming demand you put on us (thank you), some of it is a necessary byproduct of the custom furniture process, to which we are inexorably committed. Here are a couple of those byproducts explained in more detail.

1. The Trilemma: You may be familiar with the expression,"Quick, cheap, or good. Pick two." Well, as we get to choose two, we’ll split it with you. We choose quality. We just don’t know how, or want to know how to make things shoddier, so we chose quality.

The next bit is an assumption. We assume you would like us to make our goods as affordable as possible. If this is the case, we now agree that time is the thing we can’t control. This is what leads to longer than pleasant wait times, as well as missed deadlines.

We are constantly encouraged by well meaning experts to charge more for our products. While the temptation of "easier money&qout; can be compelling, we have always been committed to not making "furniture for rich people". While we know our furniture is expensive, it does make a whole category of custom-designed heirloom quality furniture accessible to anyone dedicated to making their lives Geek Chic.

2. We won't compromise your furniture to make sure someone else gets theirs on schedule. Feel good about that? Good. So do we. However, that also means that we won’t compromise someone else's table to make sure you get yours on schedule. That may sting a little, but remember the first part can’t be true without the second, and ultimately, that’s why you trusted us to make your furniture in the first place.

3. Heirloom quality furniture requires time in the making-- but also time in the choosing. Anything you manage to get wrong will be wrong longer than you will be around to experience it. That is why, even given the ability to make your furniture within a week, we wouldn’t do so. You need some time to consult with our Valets and consider, with their guidance, how it will function over a longer timeline than most people routinely consider.

Hopefully, you now have a few of the many important reasons why waiting is and always will be a part of the Geek Chic custom experience.

''Why isn't there a [insert high tech gadget name here] in the table?'

We are determined to give you a table that will withstand the test of time.

For example, if you wanted a music player in your table in the 1970s, you wanted an 8-track tape deck. 1980s, a casette tape deck.1990s a CD player, 2000s an iPod docking station, 2010s a streaming device, and 2020s the small spike that you impale into the listener's tympanic bone, which is now the only way to listen to music, rendering the installation of any of the previous technology a useless scar upon your beautiful table. (No, we don't actually know if that last one is where music is heading, but if it does, you heard it here first.)

The same goes for laptop electrical cords. We can install attachments to deal with power cords, but at the rate battery technology is changing, like your cellular phone or mp3 player, you may just have a docking station you set it on at night, rendering the need for cords obsolete.

"What table should I get?"

That really depends on your requirements.

Need it to function as a dining table and a game table? The Emissary, Portal, or the Vizier are your best choices. Want a dedicated game room table for miniature battles? Consider The Spartan. Do you want to play RPGs and Miniatures on the same table in a dedicated game room? That's Sultan territory.

Your valet will also help you with this decision.

"Where do you get your wood?"

The question you are really asking is, are we building our tables in an environmentally conscious way? The answer is a resounding yes. We use only domestic hardwoods from sustainable forests with real oversight. We are constantly evaluating manufacture to reduce our environmental impact.

" I have a great furniture/product idea to send you!"

Noooooo! Please don't!

It's not that we don't appreciate you. But in order to protect ourselves legally, we must stick to a strict "no submissions, please" policy.

If you want to commission a custom piece, you can contact sales and outline your current need (Ex. my computer desk sucks or I own this particular game and want something custom built for it.) Do not send plans, pictures, or anything beyond what your problem is, or we cannot and will not respond to you. We can then let you know if there is something we already have on our list, or something that will be coming out soon-- or if that really is a custom project you have on your hands.

Table Anatomy

Your Geek Chic table, described in layers from the top down, involves: The Tabletop (formed by a gamekeeper such as hardwood leaves or a fabric lid). The Game Vault, containing: the Acrylic Layer, Insets (Optional), Printing (Optional), and the Vault Floor. Possibly, your table has drawers or storage. And finally, it's got legs, and you should know how to use them.

Let's go down the list.


The TABLE TOP is the uppermost surface of a Geek Chic table. (It is in the same place as the top of a traditional table-- which may seem obvious to you, but since our tables go through some serious transformations, we like to give context.)


Referred to when fitting a table to a room, as it indicates the full exterior dimensions of your chosen table. (As distinguished from the GAME VAULT SIZE, which describes the dimensions of the interior play surface.)


A GAME KEEPER covers the GAME VAULT to provide you with a table top surface. This includes HARDWOOD LEAVES and FABRIC LIDS.


The rabbet is the small 3/8'' ledge that your hardwood leaves or fabric lid rest on to create your table top. It is a good idea to wax the rabbet on a regular basis.


Hardwood leaves are wooden panels that fit together to form what looks like a traditional tabletop.

Traditional hardwood leaves are used in an expanding table to fill in the center, and create a longer tabletop to accommodate extra guests. On a Geek Chic table, we chose to build up instead of out: hardwood leaves cover the GAME VAULT, and provide a dining surface while your game remains safe below.

Our leaves are 10'' wide, tongue-and-groove, and feature built-in spring tensioners that ensure the right fit while compensating for the natural expansion and contraction of hardwood through the seasons.


A FABRIC LID is sits on the RABBET and forms your TABLE TOP. If you have a game being paused in your GAME VAULT (say an ongoing RPG), and you would like to play a card or board game on your table's surface, then a fabric lid is a good option. It comes in a variety of fabrics (see below) and allows you to easily pick up small pieces. It also has a craftboard back, in case you want to do any destructive projects.


Every Geek Chic has a secondary surface beneath the table top, called the GAME VAULT. This is a dropped play area where you keep your games safe, flat, and spill-proof.

The GAME VAULT describes the entire space under the hardwood leaves or fabric lid that creates your table top. It can include an INSET. It definitely includes the ACRYLIC LAYER, any PRINTING like maps, grids, or hexes, and the VAULT FLOOR.


The GAME VAULT SIZE describes is the interior dimensions of your table-- the dropped play surface-- as opposed to the exterior dimensions of your table-- like the table top, or how big it is once the drawers are pulled out.

This is in many ways the most important metric-- since your Valet will need to help size your custom table to the games you play.


The VAULT DEPTH describes the open space between the underside of your tabletop and the VAULT FLOOR. Every table offers at least 2 ¼'' of this protected space in which to lay out your games-- neatly accommodating minis, boards, cards, auxiliary terrain, and PRINTING items like maps and grid/hex overlays.

Tables come standard with that 2 ¼'' depth, although some (like our wargaming tables) can be rather deeper. Don't worry; your Valet will help you with this.


Your table has a secret button that allows you to open it!

Somewhere along the bottom edge of your table, you'll feel a small square wooden button. Press it, and it causes a brass ejector rod to pop up along the rabbet of your table. When your table is fully closed, this causes your tabletop (either hardwood leaves or a fabric lid) to pop up with it, allowing you to grab hold of and remove it.

This allows safe access to the game vault, as opposed to jimmying your table open with a butter knife-- which as it turns out, isn't as safe as you'd think.


The ACRYLIC LAYER is the top layer in the GAME VAULT. It is a clear piece of 1/8'' thick acrylic (Plexiglas is a common brand name) that can be lifted with a SUCTION CUP (included). You place your board game, map, grid, hex, etc. underneath it to keep them flat, safe, and spill-proof.

The ACRYLIC LAYER doubles as a wet/dry erase surface. Now your table can act as a whiteboard! Make notes, draw a dungeon, mark initiatives, keep score, doodle monsters, or draw radii directly overtop your map or board. And use it to write down who went last-- because with the Game Vault, you don't have to break your game down, you can just cover an in-progress game until your group reconvenes.


Every table comes with a SUCTION CUP.

The suction cup allows you to lift the ACRYLIC LAYER on your table so you can place PRINTING like maps, grids, or hexes underneath it.

Make sure you lift the acrylic layer from a corner of your table, and not from the middle. If you lift from the middle, you will overtax your suction cup and it will break… and you probably won't have lifted your acrylic layer. Attach your suction cup at a corner, then wiggle from side to side a little to break the tension between the ACRYLIC LAYER and the VAULT FLOOR.


These are clear acetate overlays with a grid or hex pattern on them, used over a map to denote scale and to standardize movement. Our standard sizes are 1”, 1.5”, 2”, 2.5”, or 3” – custom sizes are available.


The VAULT FLOOR is the bottom-most layer on your table. It comes in standard white, but may be upgraded to bamboo.

White is best if you use large maps, and will never really see much of the vault floor-- or, alternately, if you're going to use an overhead projector to project a game map downward onto your table

If you are going to be seeing the Vault Floor often, we tend to prefer the wood look of the bamboo. And bonus: it's refinishable.



If you choose to leave one HARDWOOD LEAF in the GAME VAULT to use for extra desk space, you want to use a LEAF GUARD with it. This is an accessory, a slat of wood that slides in at a 90 degree angle to support the leaf-- as well as preventing any wayward game pieces from going underneath.


LEAF DESKS work with LEAF GUARDS to make a ring of desks around your table. For those who play both very large and very small games, this system helps accommodate both.


An INSET is an accessory that fits inside the GAME VAULT, on top of the ACRYLIC LAYER. It provides a different kind of dropped surface environment-- FABRIC, FERROUS, or LEGO.

Insets fit snugly inside your GAME VAULT, but include cloth tabs so you can lift and remove them.


A ferrous inset has whiteboard on one side and metal on the other. Should you wish to use any magnetically anchored terrain, this would be ideal for you.

Ferrous insets are thinner than our normal insets because they can be used in conjunction with Lego insets.

Our insets have two small ribbons on one side that you can use like a pull-tab to remove the inset from your table.


Legos are awesome. Your table is awesome. The two together are awesome to the nth degree.

You can turn a Geek Chic table into a Lego table with some terrain and our ferrous inset. Once the metal plate is in place, add magnetized Lego terrain in whatever configuration you desire. The great part is this isn't permanent and you can still remove all the Lego accessories and use it as a normal Geek Chic table. (Our version of normal, anyway!)

We can fill the table with Lego baseplates when you order, or you can use your own and attach some magnets.

1/23/15: In what we can only assume is an aggressive stance on the state of global ecology, LEGO has discontinued blue baseplates in favor of brick-yellow (aka "sand") baseplates. LEGO execs were unavailable for comment, stating only, "The spice must flow."


It depends how you want to use your table. This is not an either/or situation; you could have both.

FABRIC LIDS come in one piece, have a lightweight foam core, have fabric on one side, and a craft surface on the other side.

No:We don't put hardwood on one side and fabric on the other. It seems like a good idea, but because they're all in one piece, they'er too heavy and non-maneuverable. (Seriously, heavy. There is a reason the hardwood leaves are only 10'' wide.)

The benefits of a FABRIC LID include having a removable, replaceable surface with a craft board back for projects. It covers your GAME VAULT, and you can easily play games on top and have a game going underneath. The fabric side is great for gaming, allowing you to easily pick up small bits and pieces and prevents too much sliding. The craftboard side is excellent if you have projects that would potentially damage the hardwood leaves of your table (like painting miniatures, or using a glue gun, rotary blade, or sharpie). We call this the "destroy me" surface, just in case you need some backup.

An INSET can be FABRIC (using any of the fabrics we use for lids), or FERROUS (for use with Legos or magnetic pieces). Insets sit inside the GAME VAULT instead of on top of it. Playing inside the Game Vault means your tiny pieces and playing cards don't go skittering off the table (and right into the Sarlacc Pit! I wish you wouldn't keep that thing in the living room, Gary!). It also lets you line cards, etc., up along the edges. Puzzle enthusiasts may also benefit greatly from the game vault's containment.


For fabric insets and lids.

Plush Velvet

Great for small pieces! Velvet makes it hard for them to slide around, yet makes it easy for you to pick them up. This fabric has a nap, and is a little softer than the velveteen. We offer five colors: Pecan, Aubergine, Taupe, Merlot, and Navy.

Did you know? "Velvet" isn't what a fabric is made of (like silk or cotton), it describes a particular texture of fabric. By definition, velvet is a woven tufted fabric with evenly distributed threads and a short dense pile. The fuzzy part is called the nap.

Stretch Velveteen

Stretched Velveteen has no nap (when you brush it up or down, it won't look lighter or darker). Cards slide across its surface more easily than the plush velvet. We offer six colors: Navy, Green, Burgundy, Royal Blue, and Black.

Speed Cloth

For all you dealt card players out there (poker, rummy, crazy eights…), speed cloth is a low-friction woven surface that allows cards to skip smoothly and quickly across the surface, like you'd find on a poker table. Playing dealt card games on an inset is more comfortable as it gives your arms a ledge to rest on, and saves the dealer from accidentally dealing cards onto the floor. The sides of the Game Vault stop those kinds of shenanigans. We offer four colors: Burgundy, Green, Blue, and Purple.


Geek Chic In The News

  • D6 Mafia News Coverage
    A running list of Geek Chic Roadshow video tours by one of our favorite geek news crews, D6 Mafia.
  • Entrepreneur Magazine 100 Brilliant Companies 2012
    Move aside, nerds: Comics are for everyone now--and they're moving out of your parents' basement and into the boardroom. Leading the shift is Franco Arda, founder and CEO of SmarterComics, a publisher of business books that have been reimagined as illustrated texts...
  • Wired, Geekdad's 100 Geeks To Follow On Twitter
    Twitter has been inundated by, shall we say, “normals.” What was once our little playground has become rather more populated. But that doesn’t make it any less effective a tool for communication. It just means we have to stick together, and keep the geek community thriving.
  • Puget Sound Business Journal
    This is not virtual reality: Revenues at Robert Gifford’s gaming furniture company Geek Chic grew 380 percent in 2011, with so much business coming in that he had to develop ruses in order to turn it away...
  • Robert Gifford on Tabletop Episode 14: Pandemic
    Video: In celebration of the upcoming TableTop Day on March 30th, Geek & Sundry presents TableTop: Extended Editions. This week: Pandemic!
  • Robert Gifford Extended Interview (Tabletop Episode 14: Pandemic)
    Video: Extended Interview from TableTop Episode 14: Pandemic with Robert Gifford.
  • Pandemic Extended episode
    Video: Pandemic: Morgan Webb, Ed Brubaker, and Robert Gifford Join Wil on TableTop, episode 14

The Process

Current wait time: About one year from deposit to delivery. (As of 10/01/2014)

When you place a deposit, your valet will walk you through all the options. You will have several months in the pending queue to contemplate these options and decide what will work best for you.

When you reach the head of the queue, the shop liaison will call to ask if you're ready to go into the Manufacturing Queue

Answer "no", and we'll put your order in carbonite. Answer "yes" and we'll double-check your order with you and arrange to collect the balance.

Then, Geek Chic goes to work building your gaming furniture. When it's almost finished, we'll call to work out logistics.

And then, we home deliver your beautiful hardwood geek furniture.

1) Deposit

Your deposit is important: it secures your place in line and locks in pricing.

Please note that your deposit is transferable, but not refundable. You may apply your deposit to a different order (store credit), keep your order frozen in the Carbonite Queue, or apply for hardship withdrawal.

Wait times range between 6 and 14 months, depending where you live and what you're having made. To keep your wait as short as possible: Deposit when you know you want a table, not when you've made all the decisions! There are far more options than you're aware of, and you'll need to talk it all over with a valet.


2) Valet


Your Valet is your geek furniture expert and advocate, here to help you make informed decisions. They'll walk you through the multitude of possibilities in truly customizable furniture-- guiding you through the process, pointing out features you may want, and advising against unnecessary components and costs. Should you have a unique situation, they may offer you solutions that aren't publicly available.

To ensure a tailored fit, your valet asks questions about you and your interests. What games do you play? Group size? Kids? Pets? Don't be surprised when we ask how tall you and your players are so we can assist you in choosing the best height. We want to build you a piece that fits your life and your Valet is your expert "tailor".

We don't work on commission. Geek Chic believes that the concept of commission is at odds with customer service. Just like good game design, we don't incentivize behavior we don't want to see played. Your valet is here to help you get the right thing-- not the most expensive thing.)

3) Pending Queue


This is the backlog you are in while you are waiting to be invited into the Manufacturing Queue. Waiting is the hardest part. While you wait, you can continue to solidify your order with your Valet. Now's the time to take a second look at the myriad of configurations and contemplate what will work best for you.

4) Shop Liaison

When you get to the front of the line, you'll be contacted by the Shop Liaison to ask if you're ready to go into the Manufacturing Queue. If you are, they will double-check every detail of your order with you and help you finalize any areas that are still in question before we start ordering your wood. We'll also inform you of any innovations or new products that may have happened since you started your order-- so you don't have to worry that you're missing out.

Once your order is verified, the balance is due.


What if I'm not ready?

The Carbonite Queue

If you're not ready when the shop calls, and you need to delay production, we put your order in the Carbonite Queue. We understand, life is crazy (e.g., your bonus doesn't come until next month, you're getting married, your contractors are running behind, unexpected medical costs, you're moving). Don't worry. We'll freeze your order in carbonite, and the Shop Liaison will assist you when you are ready to thaw out.

5) Manufacturing Queue


Now it gets real. After your table goes into the manufacturing queue, you have a bit of a wait. This process takes 4-6 months. The Shop Liaison will be able to get you the most up-to-date information on your order as it travels through the shop.

6) Logistics


Geek Chic lives just north of Seattle, Washington. We organize our routes carefully, batching deliveries so we don't run amok across the map. The Logistics Liaison will call to verify your location, and discuss the anticipated delivery schedule with you-- so let them know if you'll be out of town or cannot accept delivery, as it will place you on a different route!

The Logistics Liaison will give you a timeframe in which the Delivery Team will depart, and a window of when it will be in your area. Everything is an estimate that can be adjusted due to things like inclement weather, vehicular troubles, unexpected shop delays (a plague runs through the shop for 1d4 days), etc. The Logistics Liaison will keep in contact and let you know if the schedule changes for any reason.

7) Home Delivery

The Delivery Team is the cross-country driving duo of song and legend who will deliver and install your furniture. When our delivery vehicle embarks on its epic journey to Your House, the team will keep you apprised of their progress on the road.

We give a "window" for arrival, as inclement weather, gridlock, a surprisingly time consuming delivery, and other unforeseen events can play a randomizing role in our delivery schedule (we roll 2d10 and consult a table just like everyone else). Your Delivery Team will keep in contact and let you know if the schedule changes for any reason.


Your Geek Chic Delivery Duo will bring your furniture into your home, assemble it, remove the packing, and do a final Quality Assurance evaluation-- making sure it meets our expectations and exceeds yours.

8) The Happy Ending

Happy Ending

You survived the wait and the reward is: It's all yours. Welcome to the world of custom, handmade, heirloom quality geek dream furniture!



For new orders, customer inquiries, and bespoke items.


For articles or interviews.


Do you really want to work for Geek Chic? Take a look at our job postings, and convince us.

Address & Social Media

Twitter @geekchiclabs

Facebook GeekChicHQ

Kickstarter /GeekChic

Geek Chic Woodshop

Geek Chic 711
100th St SE
Everett, WA 98208

Visits are by appointment only! We cannot stress that enough.

We are a fully functioning woodshop.

Please contact to arrange a tour of our facilities.


Careers at Geek Chic

By most accounts, working at Geek Chic is awesome. These accounts are compromised by what modern researchers have coined as "Stockholm Syndrome". However, since we’re always hearing how everything from Sweden is better, we can rationally assume it’s the best syndrome to have. Only the best for Geek Chic employees!

The following is a list of jobs we're actively hiring for. All positions are full-time, with benefits, on site at our woodshop in Everett, WA. (Drivers, of course, do travel.)

Click on the job title to send us an email. Include a mostly-meaningless resumé, and a very-important cover letter describing what you are obsessively curious about. Minus points for pandering.

Current Positions


Always accepting the resumés of those who live by the epigram: The life so short; the craft so long to learn. We require a variety of woodworkers at a variety of skill levels, so enquire away.



Every company has a vault of arcane policies, and we are no exception.

Home Delivery

We hand deliver our furniture for these reasons:

  1. 1. Minimize possible transit damage to pieces that would take months to replace.
  2. 2. It also allows us to set up the furniture in your home, do a final QA and answer any questions you may have.
  3. 3. We can re-use the shipping materials and not charge you for them (and you don't have to figure out what to do with the crate now.)
  4. 4. We can offer this service at cost. A traditional freight and crate carrier typically costs two to three times as much as we do.


We currently deliver our custom furniture within the continental 48 states, Canada & Alaska. If you need one of our tables internationally, read about our International Shipping Policy below.

Shipping Costs

Costs are dependent upon location; ask your Valet about current estimated shipping to your area. Minimum delivery rates are $100, Maximum delivery rates are $1000 per item in our catalogue. It depends on the amount of space your order takes up in the vehicle and your location. We live on the west coast. So a good guideline is $500-$600 dollars for a 4' x 6' Emissary to the east coast. $800 to $1000 dollars for a Sultan delivered to the east coast. Costs diminishing as you work your way back to the west.

Standard Home Delivery Includes

Our employees will arrive at one delivery location per order charged, unpack, place items in one designated area, remove all packaging debris, and ensure there is no damage to the item(s). A brief instruction about functions of the furniture is included.

Our delivery team will move your order up or down one flight of stairs that can reasonably accommodate your order.

If your order does not fit in the stairwells or elevators, etc. we are not responsible for placement of the item(s).

It is the clients responsibility to have the path to delivery cleared and the delivery location cleared for delivery.

Non-Standard Home Deliveries

If you have more than one set of stairs, tight corners, dropped ceilings, a small elevator, etc. you may still qualify for a Non-Standard Home Delivery. In these situations you would send a series of measurements and pictures to your Valet. Sometimes it requires either an alternate crate, or complete un-crating of your piece in order to get it to the space. Your Valet will check with Logistics and then go over the options and any additional costs with you.

Should Shipping Damage Occur

Our Geek Chic delivery staff will take the appropriate measures to repair the damage. If the repair can not be accomplished on-site, the workshop will handle refinishing or replacement of pieces-- or in severe cases, replacement of the entire piece. Don't worry, this doesn't really happen. We just want you to know we would take care of you if it did.


Is the table dropped off in my driveway?

No. We handle all our own freight so no one drops a multi-thousand dollar table off in your driveway and leaves it there. Our delivery team is there to make sure you get your table and it's set up in your home-- part of the ordering process includes making sure you are expecting us when we arrive.

Does my furniture come in one piece?

No. The legs are detachable form the tables. The drawers are removable from the storage pieces. The acrylic and hardwood leaves are removable. This allows us to maneuver pieces more easily during installation.

How can we be sure it will fit?

Part of the ordering process is ensuring that your table will fit. You'll be going through your halls, doors, stairwells, and landings with measuring tapes, and planning the route it will take through your home to your living room/kitchen/tablinum. You don't want to buy a table you can fit up the stairs, but not around the corner with two people lifting it! We work with you to help make sure the path is clear and the size is right.


International Shipping:

We can ship all of our Marketplace items to anywhere in the world.

Our furniture is another matter. We have taken a few international orders at this time and have experimented with some international shipping methods.

We don't currently have accurate, or even general estimated pricing on what shipping will cost. We are in the process of negotiating shipping through several companies. We all looking for the best deal that will get our handmade furniture safely to our customers homes. Even with an established relationship with negotiated rates, international shipping will be a significant cost.

If you have a shipping service you use currently we can of course work with them.

If you are interested in joining the international queue here are the steps to take:

Deposit: You place a deposit through the website on your choice of furniture.

Customizing your order: We then assist you in configuring/customizing your order (finding you the right size, optimal features, making sure the size can get into your home...:-)

Pending Queue (Our back log): We wait…when your order gets to the top of the line you are invited to go into the Manufacturing Queue.

Putting the Order into the Manufacturing Queue: To put your order into Manufacturing we would need to complete our estimate on shipping costs. **if you find out what the shipping will be and would like a refund, we can do that for international clients as long as we have not already started making your piece. Once an estimated shipping is agreed to, then the Shop Liaison double-checks your order to makes sure that you are getting the most optimal style, configuration and features for you. They then collect the remaining manufacturing payment. The order is then sent to the shop and they start the process by ordering your wood and planning for the details of making your furniture.

Baby Photos: Once your order is made, the Shop Liaison sends you snapshots of the epic journey your furniture took in its making. :)

Shipping & Delivery: When your piece is completed, we will get the finalized shipping cost and collect any remainder or reimburse any overage. We send the piece off the you and you live happily ever after with your Geek Chic furniture!

Overall, our pieces are very sturdy, durable and heirloom quality. (We also use a conversion varnish, which is a catalyst finish that they use on bars, kitchens and bathrooms to keep out moisture.) So we are not worried about them making the trip, we are just uncertain on the cost it would take to get them to our clients. So if you would like to take this journey with us, we would be more than happy to take this journey with you.

Ordering Custom Furniture

Our custom furniture is made to order, and orders are non-cancelable, non-returnable and non-refundable with the exception of manufacturer defects or damages. (Non-visible defects and accidental damage are rare, but be assured we will make things right if they should occur with your furniture). Customers will have 72 hours from placement of deposit to cancel. After 72 hours the deposit will be retained by Geek Chic and cannot be refunded.

We are not monsters. The deposit policy is in place to protect both parties. If life throws you a curve, contact your valet to discuss possible options, including deposit transfer options, the carbonite queue, or hardship withdrawal.

To place a custom order, contact One of our valets will confirm the details of your order.


If you are mailing a check, we must receive it within 7 days of the online invoice or telephone order to ensure your place in line. Production time will vary for custom furniture orders upon demand. Please email with any questions, or call your valet.

Forms of payment for custom purchases:

All payments must be in U.S. funds and drawn on a U.S. bank only. We accept credit cards, checks, paypal, and money orders. Credit card orders are processed same day. Orders using check or money order take 5-10 business days to process from date of deposit. A $25.00 charge will be assessed for any check returned for insufficient funds.

Make checks/money orders payable to:

Geek Chic
711 100th Street SE
Everett, WA 98206

Canceling Orders

Customers will have 72 hours from placement of deposit to cancel. Custom orders cannot be cancelled once they are put into production. No exceptions.

Returns and Exchanges

We do not accept returns on custom items. If an item has been damaged in shipping, once your claim is filed by our delivery service, we will commence production of your replacement. If a manufacturing defect is found, we will arrange a repair or replacement.

Privacy Policy

No information provided by you to Geek Chic will be sold, shared or traded: in full or in part. We treat your personal information with the utmost confidentiality.

The Emissary

Quick Overview

The Emissary includes: Choice of wood (cherry, maple, oak, or walnut), clear finish, choice of height, rail system, lengthwise hardwood leaves, 2'' deep game vault, white vault floor, acrylic layer, and a suction cup (to lift the acrylic layer).


Suck it, Swiss Army

The Emissary is just that-- our diplomat, our ambassador. Its fine features and versatility get its visa stamped for dining rooms, living rooms, kitchens, dining rooms, dens, and family rooms. (If you had a ballroom, it would learn to waltz.) Equally versed in dining and gaming, the Emissary smoothly mediates the transition between the two.

This dual-surface table is here to expertly facilitate your needs. Bring your hobbies out of the garage and your games out of the closet: Laptops, art projects, sewing, puzzles, paperwork, card games, minis, and meals are all at home here.

For the first time, you don't need to compromise; you can have a table that is beautiful and functional. No matter what your need of the moment is-- The Emissary serves as an invitation to break bread and share in what truly defines our lives.

Deposit: $1400